241 views | January 22nd, 2010 | Bookmark This Post | No Comments
My real father stayed with us a few years ago and it was a social disaster, ending with everyone in everyone else’s business until he was finally kicked out.
I didn’t get along with him at all and thought it was best to avoid him. However, since there was no smoking in the house, only in the basement where he stayed, I had to deal with him every time I wanted a cigarette and didn’t want to go outside. I got very good at it, too — after I discovered how to discern what he wanted rather than merely accepting what he said he wanted.
Basically, every time he got in my face about something, I was able to expose his disguised premises, forcing him to focus more on hiding his emotions and weaknesses than on attacking me. He’s the closest I’ve come to meeting an actual person who has no concept of self, no idea of the virtue of independence. I was very fortunate not to have grown up contending with such an influence.
I learned early on not to argue with him, which is hard for me because I love to argue. I also learned how to talk with him without really listening to him. He was always trying to teach me something, trying to make up for all the lost years, and I didn’t need that. What he didn’t realize is that if there was even the smallest detail of life that he could show me, he’d never be able to get it through to me because he had forced me to ignore him in the interest of self-defense. Of course, he didn’t really care about teaching me anything, only about making everyone think he was a wise old man, but I’ve wondered ever since if maybe there was something I missed in all of our “conversations.”
Well, last week I finally stumbled on something he was right about and I was wrong about: it really is more manly to take a bath than it is to take a shower.
Everyone in our house took showers except for him. His usual ritual was to wake up late in the afternoon, after another drunken night, and then come upstairs and take a bath. He’d start the water running and then step out on the back porch for a cigarette. One time my sister-in-law said something to him about it, implying he was lazy for always taking a bath. I don’t know what she said exactly, but later he asked me about it, wondering innocently: “But isn’t it more manly to take a bath?”
I expected him to just deflect the issue by insulting her or trying some other trick, so an exploration of masculinity was the last thing I was prepared to discuss. Nonetheless, I told him he was crazy, that a “real” man wouldn’t have time to take a bath and that I didn’t think it was really an issue of manliness. I always thought he took baths because he had a bad back. It turned out he does it because John Wayne always took baths in his movies.
I laughed, of course, when I heard his reason, thinking most of those movies are set in the “Wild West” where taking showers probably wasn’t even an option, but I also thought of where any further argument would lead and just let it go. He didn’t press the issue and I marked it off as more evidence proving the generational divide between us.
Lately it’s been very cold here in Georgia and for about ten consecutive days the temperature was below freezing. One day I started to take a shower and the cold water pipe was frozen, so I decided to take a bath. Don’t take this out of context, but it was the first time I’d taken a bath in years.
Immediately after getting into the water and relaxing back, I felt my body coming alive. The sore feelings I always have in my legs went away. My entire body warmed up as the blood began to circulate properly. For a few minutes I wondered if I’d be able to make myself get out of the tub, thinking how easy it would be to just close my eyes and go to sleep.
I didn’t think of John Wayne, but it did make me think of why people always get into a full bathtub before they slit their wrists in movies. It’s not just for visual effect or because suicidal people actually care if they make a mess with their blood; it’s because in a tub of hot water is the most comfortable place to die.
By the time I was out of the bath and back to living my life, I realized it is much more manly to take a bath than it is to take a shower.
I sit at a computer all day so this doesn’t necessarily apply to me, but if you consider a pro football player after a hard day of practice or a construction worker after twelve hours in the sun and dirt or a cowboy after a cross-country hunt for some outlaws, then you can see taking a shower just doesn’t get it done for these guys. How long could they keep up such a lifestyle if they merely came home and took a shower, and then kicked back with a beer and fell asleep watching Sportscenter. It may be more efficient to take a shower, but taking a bath is more refreshing. It’s like hitting a reset button for the body, which is exactly what the most manly of men need.
Now I know some men might say that a “real” man doesn’t need to be “refreshed,” that he can handle anything. But that’s what I’d call a dead man, in the long term at least. And others might say I should’ve just listened to my father and it wouldn’t have taken so long for me to learn such a simple fact. I say “just listening” to someone is not learning anything.
I’m not “my father’s son,” not even close. I think for myself as a rule, and I always tried to, even before I knew the rule.
I’m most certainly not a “real” man, either. I’m 5′9″ and 150 pounds and I slow cook my meat until it’s well done. Regardless, I’m going to feel like one from now on, every time I take a bath like John Wayne.
928 views | January 21st, 2010 | Bookmark This Post | No Comments
I’m working on a new long term project, a series of videos that explains and demonstrates the meanings of crucial concepts, such as “freedom,” “art” and “morality.” I call it “More Than Words.”
I think there’s a need for it because most people have a very loose understanding of what words are and what their role is in human life. It seems everything I read or see is obviously wrong and if we all made an effort to use words properly, taking care to fully comprehend their meaning and purpose, then the state of our culture would be drastically different.
As an example, take the word “freedom.” If you asked Barack Obama if he believed in political freedom, he’d probably say: “Of course.” But he obviously believes in using the power of the government for wealth redistribution — though he’d prefer the term “economic justice.” Well, he can’t possibly believe it’s right to steal from some and give to others, unless he doesn’t really believe in freedom.
So what makes him think he can get away with saying he believes in freedom when he clearly does not? What makes him think he can get away with legislating the redistribution of wealth in a free country? He’s counting on the fact that most people don’t really understand what the word “freedom” means, at least not in a political context.
That’s the purpose of these videos I’m working on. I think an exploration of certain concepts is desperately needed in our culture today. Sure, most people (writers, journalists, politicians, etc.) misuse words on purpose in order to trick people into agreeing with them, and most of the people who follow them do so because they don’t want the responsibility of thinking for themselves, but there are just as many people out there, I think, who are simply confused and frustrated because they see how screwed up everything is, only they can’t quite figure out why or what can be done about it.
Well, it all starts with words. The accuracy of our knowledge and the efficacy of our actions all rests on words and their meanings. Every big mistake or failure, both in our thinking and in our actions, is ultimately caused by an evasion or a misuse of the words involved. Yet most people treat words as if they are something we magically absorb as a child and how well we use them is genetically determined by how powerful one’s brain is. They don’t see them as tools for apprehending reality and thinking properly; they see them merely as a means of communication, not really even comprehending what it is that they communicate.
I’m working on the first video now. It’s going to be a short introduction to the series and I’m also going to give an example of how I plan to explore a concept in video form. The idea is that explaining the importance of words and concept-formation isn’t enough, so I’m going to demonstrate the process by exploring the meanings of important words. I know I can’t think for anyone else, but maybe it will help to at least see how it’s done.
Another reason why I’m doing this is it’s fun. I get to write and work in 3D at the same time, and on projects that don’t take years for one person to do. I’ve always wanted to create animations and now I finally have an idea I can actually do. It took a few weeks of trying to turn my first draft into a script, working out some problems and determining the basic format, but I think I have it down now and all that’s left to do is create the videos.
At the moment I’m working on the script, learning FL Studio (for sound effects and music), and trying to learn how to speak properly, or at least well enough to pull this off. I’ll try to post work-in-progress images and videos as I go.
20,003 views | August 11th, 2009 | Bookmark This Post | No Comments
An outdoor end table for Google SketchUp modeled in a toon-style with three variations: a basic SketchUp version, a cartoon version with the wood grain modeled into the surface, and a B&W comics version with the wood faces painted white and the grain faces painted black. The reason for the different versions is to make the components useful for all varieties of SketchUp users.
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Note: for the comics version to look correct (black & white) in your scene, you need to go to the “Shadow Settings” window and turn on shadows or “Use Sun for Shading” and set the “Dark” slider to 80 or more. If you don’t want shadows, just set the “Light” slider to zero. If you do want shadows, set it to 100.
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3,614 views | August 10th, 2009 | Bookmark This Post | No Comments
Here’s another SketchUp model. It’s a wooden lounge chair in a somewhat “toon-style” design like my last model. There are three versions again, too: a basic SketchUp version, a cartoon version with the wood grain modeled into the surfaces, and a comics version with the wood faces painted white and the grain faces painted black. The reason for the different versions is to make the components useful for all varieties of SketchUp users.
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Click an Image to Enlarge. |
Note: for the comics version to look correct (black & white) in your scene, you need to go to the “Shadow Settings” window and turn on shadows or “Use Sun for Shading” and set the “Dark” slider to 80 or more. If you don’t want shadows, just set the “Light” slider to zero. If you do want shadows, set it to 100.
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6,658 views | August 5th, 2009 | Bookmark This Post | 1 Comment
Here’s a toon-style picnic table for SketchUp. I’m calling it “toon” because it has a more fun shape to it than a normal picnic table and because there are three versions of it: a basic version and two versions with the wood grain actually modeled in the surface. All of the file sizes are fairly small, too. The basic version is only 160kb and the grain versions are about 280kb each.
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Click an Image to Enlarge. |
The cartoon version is colored with the edges softened, making it look like a cartoon. And the comics version is black & white with the edges softened, using a white color for the wood faces and a black color for the grain faces, making it look hand-drawn. The idea was to make it more useful for comics pencilers.
Note: for the comics version to look correct in your scene, you need to go to the “Shadow Settings” window and turn on shadows or “Use Sun for Shading” and set the “Dark” slider to 80 or more. If you don’t want shadows, just set the “Light” slider to zero. If you do want shadows, set it to 100.
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